I'm still kind of in shock. Read the reviews, and I almost want to say "Hey, hey, hey, the Texas Series was only my second attempt at writing, and one of the few I actually finished!"
*cringe* I love Texas and all of the characters, and yes, it needs much more polish. I know that now, I try to do better now. But I know how easily I could get swept up into that world again if I tried to go back and edit it, rather than keeping the book closed as it were.
So if you are brought here by goodreads to read the Texas series, welcome. Just give the amateur writer a pass for wanting to tell a story without getting caught up in all the literary mechanics. *face palm*
That being said,
When I actually started publishing on lj, it was for fun. All the ideas floating around in my head and being an avid reader, I just dove in head first, and with the kindness of others, I didn't break my frakkin' neck. But mindless fun does evolve, and I wanted to be better. (I wouldn't say that I am any good, I just pay more attention now than then). With that evolution came doubts, endless WIPs with no future of being finished, worrying about word count, and on and on. Until the fingers just froze over the keyboard, there were still pieces of stories but a real fear of "What the hell am I doing, there are so many more worthy and much better than I"
I've come back slowly to my first love. Instead of worrying incessantly over the fragments, I'm in love with characters again. How they slowly flesh out, begin to breathe on the page, and with it the story develops around them. That's how it works for me. I've tried to work with an outline (see the above on freezing). That works better for a Nano effort to keep on track with word count to reach a goal.
But storytelling? It is the characters, the way they whisper, the way they dance, the way they demand their stories to be told. I love Texas, Kyle, Sal, and Paul. I hope they would be proud of Hadley, Cameron, Cade, Daniel, etc.
And much love for the lj communities, the kind people here, who read, who give support, comments to help growth, or just help to keep the chin up. I'm glad I'm still here. I hope ya'll are too. :)